The Love I Fantasize About.

I want love where we will talk about our fears, what triggers us, our past, our highs and lows without feeling judged or intimidated.

Author: Gakunde

Everyone has a way they spend their single life. Some flirt until their shoe fits, others pray about it and hope God will match them with their significant other, others go out with friends and enjoy their single life so they never regret any time of their single life.

Well I am kinda different I think because my single life is all about dreaming and designing the man I want. I think about it like two times a day.

I don’t think it’s because am tired of being single because I don't just date anyone. So, I've been ticking off the list I made for mister perfect that I'm looking for.

It's a long list. My brother says that to get a man like that would require making one, or raising him by myself. Like can’t someone’s son meet my standards? They are not even that much anyways. They are just fantasies.

I always fantasize about the love I want and how extra ordinary it would be. Oh no wait, am not talking about the prince charming and all those cinderella stories. It's not love at first sight when two people bump into each other and go home together.

It's not the one every novel and movie tales talk about neither is it the one that looks good on pictures without knowing what’s going on behind curtains.

I fantasize about the love where he won’t stay just because I kissed him right, or come to me because he saw a nice picture of me, because I really don’t look that way when I wake up in the morning. I want him to love me the same even in my bonnet and PJs!

I want love where going a day without talking won’t be because either of us has ego, or trying to be hard to get.

I want love where we will laugh about our crazy jokes, celebrate our every little wins, make promises and keep them, have peace, and give it.

I want love where we will talk about our fears, what triggers us, our past, our highs and lows without feeling judged or intimidated.

The kind of love where he brings me flowers not because I talked about how I love them.

Love that makes you forget your wrinkles while taking pictures because you are having real joy and not caring about what people think.

Love where we can sing together our favorite songs, not caring about how ugly our faces look when we hit the wrong keys and laugh about singing the wrong lyrics.

Love where I am not afraid of what the future will bring because we will put into God's hands in prayer.

Love where he will love me not only in front of his boys or our family and friends but also on his knees putting my life in God’s hands.

Love that prays with me and prays for me.

I want love that will stay even when am I'm having my worst days.

Love that encourages, pushes and supports my dreams.

Love that believes in me when I least believe in myself.

Love that is so beautiful that my daughter will fantasize having when she's ready.

Love that even I will be looking at and be like, God this was you.

The kind of love where I won’t have to squeeze myself into a tight red dress for him to say I look gorgeous.

Love that is free.

Love that is inspiring.

Love that is based on truth and honesty.

Love when anything happens I will think of him first.

Love that doesn’t hurt or break each other .

Love where we all ain’t perfect but willing to correct our mistake and to learn through life.

Love that I will always go to bed with a happy and thankful heart.

Hear me out, I am not talking about a perfect love because I haven’t came across one, and I can’t make one. I may not be able to give one.

I am talking about love where ego, pride, jealous, and lies have no seat.

Love that isn’t bound by lust and empty promise.

Love where we all wanna be perfect together.

Love that has all the meanings of love.

Love that understands my language and my boundaries.

Love that respects each other's choices without pretending because we both love each other for who we are.

The kind of love that when I look into his eyes, I will see nothing but the love that I always fantasized about in my early twenties!

Having that love isn't easy but I want it. I am working on my flaws and weaknesses. I know I have them.

I am working on my past wounds because honestly I can't give such love that I crave for when I myself is not ready to give it. I am growing and learning with hope that I will give that love.

My brother says that finding this kind of man or this type of love is close to being impossible. So, I am wondering if someone out there thinks this type of love is possible. If you are out there, why don’t you let me know?