Losing Her Was Like Losing Half Of Me.

How can I forget the other leg that walked me through all the doors in life, the leg that shaped the future I am living, the leg I lost? Today, I managed to build a good life. I finally woke up and realized my mother’s life would go in vain if I didn't make the best out of it. I walked, and still walking with my one leg.

Author: Inshuti Divine

"I am sorry my beautiful Celine, my loving child. I honestly have no choice but to tell you this. It is as hard for me to tell you as it will be for you, but what I want you to always remember is that we are in this together. Whatever happens". She said.

I looked in her eyes, sincerely and apologetic and decided to take in her news calmly. She then said in a very small voice: “Your dad and I are divorcing.” I was twelve when she told me that.

Of course I wasn’t ready. Consequently, it seemed like I was the reason they couldn’t take it anymore. They had to put up with me until I was not so dumb anymore to understand that reality that took them forever to tell me.

My parents always acted so sweet in my eyes. I grew up wanting to be like them. I could see myself (or my future at least) in their eyes. I wanted to see myself in their eyes.

As young as I was, my mum took me with her after the divorce. Dad went for his second wife who was actually the reason to their divorce, and married her.

My mother worked hard as most desperate women do when they want to give a bright future to their children. Especially when she was a single mother who will always have to prove something in people’s eyes. To prove that she can do it.

“Celine, you are my only child. I will give my heart out for you to give you the best life”. She’d say that before I went to bed. Deep down I knew those words meant the world to me.

We struggled yes, and lived such a life of hustling and trying everything. But we lived and laughed. All of these things made me want to make it up to her someday. I wanted to see her happy, free of hustles and struggles.

Several years later, after graduating from high school, I was ready to pursue my dreams. I had so many projects, and had the best person to rely on.

My mother supported my ideas and always encourage me to pursue them. She’d invest money, support and have faith in me even when no one else did. Even after every failed attempt, she would invest in me again and burn it again. She gave me the reason to rise up again.

By age twenty, I started losing hope for all my dreams I grew up with. I was only able to survive on my mother's support.

When my precious mother fell sick, my mind went blank. I didn’t want to think of the worst that could happen. So I kept faith and went to hospitals after hospitals.

She died a few months later from liver diseases. I lost her. I didn’t know whether I would live again. She was my Knight in shinning armor!

She would walk me to places I couldn’t work myself. She created a life I never thought was possible. Yes, she paid for my school and mentored my journey of persistence. Ooh and she also chose me over getting married again because she thought I might not be taken care of.

And now she was gone. I was left here unable to walk any step further to my future. I was no longer Celine whose mother who relied on her mother for everything.

My whole self died the day she died. The reason why I am still alive is because I kept her alive in heart. Doing so made me whole again.

But how can I forget the leg that walked me through all the doors in life, the leg that shaped the future I am living, the leg I lost? She was that leg!

Today, I managed to build a good life. I finally woke up and realized my mother’s life would go in vain if I didn't make the best out of it. I walked, and still walking with my one leg.