Learning, Growing, Becoming

How to navigate twist and turns of life. To be honest, it has never been easy! I'm open to surprises, to disappointments and always ask God to give me strength to move on.

Author: Irakoze Gisèle

As a high school graduate, a gap year was a good time to explore the world, take care of yourself, learn new things, have fun and so and so before joining university (only by God's grace).

It was too exciting to sign my first contract at the age of only 19! I was very hyped! I had always wanted to be part of institutions create an impact in the country in one way or another.

To be honest, it has never been easy!

At such age, to leave home to another region where no one would notice you, take care of you, and where connections would always be harder to communicate with your parents and relatives, it would be challenging.

Let's leave aside the tight weather condition with my respiratory difficulties (those that know me well, know I can't survive in a cold weather)

Let's also put aside the fact that I had to live in a ghetto, that I had to manage every single thing on my own!

They would say "Shira umuteto", that was my time to grow, my time for parents to trust me and free me for the first time in their lives, to let me go to one side of the country where I had no relative or close family friend!

Where the whole district would be found with no tarmac road.

It was tight huh!(some of you might be laughing at me, I know! you'd say" that's just nothing dear")

It was a big deal, I had a different life before, everything was literally new now! Guess what! I was the happiest person on the planet!

Despite all the distance it would take me to reach to schools I had to coach, despite that I had to pass through swamps and get where I was going with absolutely no shape, I was very happy.

Not because I had to receive a good salary at the end of the month but because I knew I had kids to inspire, to encourage, motivate and impact to build.

And trust me nothing feels good than getting calls from them. Even today they still telling me how much they love me and miss me, and how much they have managed to grow.

Thank God I did that mission no matter how hard it was.

I remember one day I had to go to one of these schools, and we had to travel by boat.

It was tough, but here is one thing you have to get "finding everything exciting, even in a bad situation manage to make it more entertaining and funny."

It was tough because the boat was too old, too small and it had to carry both me and the boat driver (it was risky in other words)

I had a good reason to give up. Plus I had many other job opportunities that were waiting for me, but I decided to stay until the day...

I Got Fired

So it was the end of the trimester, almost the end, and we had trainings in the weekend. Saturday to be precise.

Since everyone was responsible for her district, of course it seemed like I had no other choice (not because I was desperate or was afraid I'd loose the job but because I had to be more responsible)

But I had a choice to call my elder to let them know about my absence during the trainings.

"I am an SDA (Seventh Day Adventist)", I said " And u know I can't work on the Sabbath ", at first he thought I was joking, but I was serious...

I didn't want to disappoint on that weekend so I went for the trainings. But that was my last day at work!

The next week he called me, he wanted us to talk about it.

There was no way I would be fired since in my contract there was nowhere written that I had to work in the weekends(I had a supportive point), but he showed me all the facts that would prove me that it was still necessary to work on Saturdays.

So if I wouldn't work then I had to be replaced but still work as backup. I had made a choice and I wasn't regretting it, and I have to capitalize this I DON'T WORK FOR PEOPLE OR FOR A COMPANY, I WORK WITH THEM.

It means if I decided to be at a place it means it is now mine, I make sure I give my best to save it. And this was my good time for my studies so I joined university.

Great and unexpected disappointment

Although I'm not going to mention the name of the organization I was working WITH, one of the typical and good thing I loved about it is how from the day you join them you are inspired to start your own business.

For someone like me who had always had the same vision, it was a perfect match!

I was encouraged to register my business (named after my blog) in RDB(Rwanda Development Board). And of course I was sure of where the capital would come from.

One was my personal savings and another was the support we had to get from that NGO. I had been promised I would still get that money (remember I still had the contract, still had the promise and still had a reason for my plans).

I started the business, before anyone else, I started by selling bags and letter clothes (I was into fashion).

I had now enough time for the business I had opened. As for my studies I was ready to help in case I'd be called (we still were and are good friends, I'm even sure they are reading this).

It was until September there had to be some business trainings (I really needed that very much) but when I asked if I can get an access to them too, they say I couldn't (SHOCKING!), yet I still had the right to it!!

I just did not give up. I always didn't want to depend on them but of course I still needed money for God's sake who doesn't need money!

But I received NOTHING, yeah taste that, let it sink in your brain, I RECEIVED NOTHING of all the promises I had!!

When I tried to contact them, it turned to be as if I was a fool!!

"Who gave u the promise? When? Where? How",

"We made new contracts after you left and we are sorry you are not eligible for the business support" that was October to November!

Of course I had nothing to do about it, some told me to address the issue on an extended level but no thanks.

I'm not that kind of a person! I'm open to surprises, to disappointments and always ask God to give me strength to move on.

Until this year, I discovered that when you register a business, automatically RRA(Rwanda Revenue Authority) would be there with open hands to receive you and collect taxes.

Trust me I've studied economics but I didn't know that every year businesses have to do declarations!

And who else would have told me! No one, surprisingly I received a message from RRA to report to them.

I had no way out, only what I had in mind was, after all this and if I see myself walking out this, God I promise you, I'll close this stupid business (Which also takes a whole bunch of processes and resources).

I had and still have to work as hard as I can to clear my situation with RRA.

I'm sorry to say, I blame myself but not as much as I blame the NGO which has not been trustful enough to keep their promise or may be not throw me into a situation I couldn't handle myself (I had to be guided enough).

I hope someone can understand what I have been through lately lol. So as I conclude, I will leave you with the words of the Psalmist.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way, and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea. Though its waters roar and foam, and the mountains quake with their surging.

~Psalms 46:2,3

You only should fear God. Do his will and obey his commandments. We should not worry about what we shall become if we loose the opportunities.

We have to try to remain faithful to God. He gave them to us maybe to test us.

He shall always walk us through the valleys, his plans for us are way better than what we can dare to imagine. He is God. Be it in good or bad. He remains God.

Thank u for taking time to read this, share your comment! And if you have a helpful story to share please do. We long to grow!